31/03/2008

Giant Starfish Discovery


March 28, 2008—Giant sea stars or starfish that measure 24 inches (60 centimeters) across are held by Sadie Mills, left, and Niki Davey of New Zealand's National Institute of Water and Atmospheric Research

Exclusive Photo Of Man In 'Squirrel Sex Case'

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Collecting Honey From Giant Bees

In Bangladesh's Sundarban Forest, a beekeeper fans smoke into a hive of giant honeybees to calm the swarming insects before collecting their honey. Found in forested areas of the Indian subcontinent, Indonesia, and central China, Apis dorsata, the giant honeybee, grows to nearly an inch (2.5 centimeters) long and builds hives as large as nine feet (three meters) in diameter.

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29/03/2008

Kid's Having Kid's

Well I am still off work for a week or two so I have been watching out for more candidates for 'Dumbest kid on daytime TV' (see posts below  "I really ought to get some work done", KIDS GRRRRRRR ), I got watching the Jeremy Kyle Show from the UK,

This week they have a real live-wire on the show, another who is there for a DNA test to see if this baby is his, he informs us he has doubts that he is but doesn't offer any reason for this doubt. Kyle, the host, before reading the results asks each of the guests "what are the odds of the young man being the father, the mother of the child says 100%, she is certain that he is the dad,  Kyle turns to the guy who is almost asleep!, he is THAT alert!, a "huh" and a  "what" later  Kyle repeats himself, "what are the odds you are the father" "oh" he says " 50/50" Kyle, "based on what?"-

Young man, "based on if I am the father or if I'm not"   smile_sad

Kyle just shakes his head and reads out the result from the card, the guy IS the father, Kyle takes the card and offers it to the guy and says, "so what does it mean?", meaning what does the result mean to you?, how will this affect you?

The 'professor' pauses , looks at the card?  and say's now holding the card out for all to see, " It means I am the father" smile_zipit

You couldn't make it up.............................................

 

Sky Satellite TV carry the channel ITV where you can see The Jeremy Kyle Show, it goes out Mon-Fri 9.25am GMT

We All Had A Teacher Like This........................

 

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Jose's 'Undetectable' False ID

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Now This Is 'Taking The Piss'

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28/03/2008

Dutch Health Minister Says Marijuana Is Exempt From July 1 Smoking Ban

AMSTERDAM - Dutch health minister Ab Klink said visitors to coffee shops will be free to smoke marijuana as long as it is not mixed with tobacco, after a smoking ban affecting all restaurants and bars goes into effect on July 1.

He was asked what (if anything) would happen to the notorious 'coffee shop's' ( known the world over for the availability of high quality Marijuana and Cannabis resin and pretty nice coffee i might add, no one seems to mention it for some reason?) when the ban kick's in

Current tobacco laws do not cover smoking Marijuana/Cannabis  in it's pure form so is not affected by the new law , however being known for their tolerant nature and knowing some customers will prefer to use tobacco in their spliffs and chillums,  coffee shop owners are permitted to provide a separate room where tobacco can be smoked, shop staff will not be allowed to serve or work in such areas.

Minister Klint say's he will look into the effect of the ban on coffee shops at the end of 2008 early 2009 including what percentage of cafe's had installed the smoking area's. 



26/03/2008

Wanker Held At Gunpoint

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24/03/2008

Assassin Spider of Madagascar


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With its fearsome appearance, poisonous bite, and deadly hunting skill, this newly discovered creature lives up to its name: assassin spider.

Researchers working in Madagascar  discovered this and eight other species of assassin spiders—a family of arachnids that feast on other eight-leggers—during a four-year survey of the island nation's forests.

The scientists say these spiders (discovered in 2006) are exquisitely evolved—if grotesque-looking—killers.

The spiders stab their prey with their giant jaws, which are barbed at the ends with venomous fangs. To be able to lift their outsized jaws, the assassins evolved elongated necks, giving the spiders a unique ability to strike from a distance                                              Arachnophobes can relax: Assassin spiders are a mere eighth of an inch (two millimetres) long and are harmless to humans, An 1/8 of an inch, Jeez no wonder it took 4 years to find them.smile_wink

"We warned you we would get our dad"

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This Old 'Temperance Society' Poster Must Have Had Men Rushing For A Bottle (Just in case these women change their minds)

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20/03/2008

Plane Stupid You Decide

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This guy started a protest group with his buddy, they wanted to piss and moan about another runway planned for Heathrow Airport near London England, ( fair enough, it is already the busiest airport in the world by far) one of their stunts involved them climbing on top of the Houses of Parliament to wave some banners while this one did press interviews on his cell phone, Now be honest, could you take this dickwash seriously?. No! neither did anyone else The new terminal at Heathrow opened to the press this week!

18/03/2008

Penis Festival

 

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Twelve Japanese men spin a giant wooden phallus at the Tagata Shinto Shrine in Komaki, as part of the annual Hōnen festival

16/03/2008

Cool Parakeet

14/03/2008

Irony.........

Just A Great Idea.

While visiting the Caribbean, Alfred Heineken saw two major problems, the beaches were littered with beer bottles and there was a lack of affordable building materials, he passed the idea on to an architect Dutchman John Habrakan who came up with this design, unbelievably this was back in 1963 way ahead of its time, this week Coca cola have announced plans to reduce the amount of glass used in their famous 'hourglass' bottle, while this is a great step the 'WOBO' (world bottle) as the one from 1963 is known shows we can go a lot further than merely reducing the amounts used!
Here's an interesting fact:- in the USA alone aluminum cans are being consumed at a rate of 106,000 every 30 SECONDS!That comes out at almost 13 million cans an hour or 300 million cans each and every day!.

I Really Ought To Get Some Work Done

I have to stop watching all this 'daytime' TV and get some work done, i did it again today, i took so long getting my shit together this morning  it was just too late to go to work!, plus my boss said if i come in late once more i am finished!!.  Again, i sat watching that Jeremy Kyle (he is on at around 9.25 am GMT on ITV from England) There was a 19 year old kid on today taking a paternity test to prove his child was his! get this, the reason he doubted the boy was his own ...........  "she fell pregnant in the first week we got together and as we know, you can't get pregnant so soon into a relationship!"  WHAT THE F***!!!!, the guy is 19 years old and he thinks this is a fact!, i am not really surprised he didn't use protection then, or maybe they only had sex stood up "Just in case"

If you think that is a moronic reason to deny fatherhood what about this 'gem' from Maury Povich, I swear this is true,  they have a couple on the show, both originally from Mexico, they now lived (separately)  in L.A, when Maury asks why the guy is so sure he is not the father of the baby, he say's " Aw come on Maury, look, i am Hispanic! listen to him,  the kid doesn't even have an accent ".

12/03/2008

KID'S GRRRRRRRR

On a Satellite TV show from England, there was a kid (15) just on  who wants " to be listened to,and a bit of respect, that's all, 'sniff' 'sniff' " this self same kid calls his grandmother " a C_ _T " and beats on his mom!, Cheeky LiL forker, i know what he does want!, So, i got thinking how this is all our own fault, selfishly, we encourage our babies to stand up and to talk the second they are able,it gives us a kick to succeed,  what mom or dad doesn't love to be able to say their child was running and singing at only 7 weeks and 3 days?, OK, i know, a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the point! we do it for ourselves, the kid  would be quite happy to lie in it's crib all day,( by the time they are 14 they will be Olympic class at it) and lets be honest , the second they get to be teens we just want them to sit down and shut the F*** up!, it's time to stop being selfish with our children, it's time to stop teaching the little darlings how to walk or talk, maybe then they wont expect "a bit of respect" or at least  they wont be able to call Granny a C_ _T !!!.  See, It's for their own good.

09/03/2008

Dick Without Control, Crazy ad from Europe

The Strangest Looking Caterpillars (not sure if this matters but these 4 are 'resting')

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Stunning Photography

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This Guy Didn't Let Go Of The Home Made Firecracker In Time...."can you imagine the noise this guy made!"


This Makes A Change

An image of a piece of toast on a statue of the virgin Mary.....

Idiot's

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This is the two 'women' who were arrested for force feeding  a 12 yr old Cannabis, looking at the one on the left, we can at last see what happened to 'baby Jane'

Tulip Fields Of Holland

BABY 'SNAKE'

When i first saw this video, i was unsure if this was real or a special effect, however i have now been assured by a medical professional it is the most extreme form of a condition known as 'EPIDERMAL LYSIS BULLOSA' a terrible condition which ranges in severity and can be as little as a small patch of skin affected to the extreme example the baby in the video, these poor children are extremely rare and do not live very long they are usual dead within a few hours, this is a heartbreaking video and if you are sensitive do not watch.

If Anything Deserves To Called ODD It Is This..............

06/03/2008

"You Do The Time We'll Do The Math"

According to police in Honolulu in January, it was Ellis Cleveland who robbed four banks within a five-day span,so when police put this to ‘Brains’ Cleveland at the time of his arrest, he declared, “Four. I didn’t do four. I only robbed three banks. But it doesn’t matter because I’m not talking to you guys. I want a lawyer.” Police later said that Cleveland was not counting the attempted robbery on Dec. 31 of the Bank of Hawaii because, after three different tellers tried unsuccessfully to decipher his holdup note, Cleveland gave up and walked out empty-handed.smile_embaressed

The 'Politician's Car

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SOME THINGS YOU'LL NEVER NEED!

This is............ well, sick? dumb? disgusting? you decide.

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This from the company........."The Turd Twister is a complete kit for shaping your Turd into amazing designs... Order today, and we'll send you our Turd Twister Starter Kit. The Starter Kit ships with our 10 most popular Turd Twisters for only $9.95. That's 10 laugh-inspiring, dishwasher-safe Turd Twisters, and that's just the beginning! In addition, you'll get the Amazing Manual called "How to Twist Your Turds"..........-And as a bonus, by ordering online, we'll throw in a Safe-T-Floss™ Retraction Cord. Incredibly useful if your Turd Twister gets stuck somewhere it shouldn't be in the first place ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ANGEL SNOT????

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This from the company.........."In our busy world it's easy to forget that miracles really do happen. With its lovely scent and comforting texture, Angel Snot is a heavenly reminder of the magic at work in our everyday lives. We say "Bless You" when someone sneezes because medieval folk believed a sneeze was the soul escaping the body. Clearly, there is a strong connection between nasal mucus and the miraculous power of heaven's messengers. This beautiful jasmine-scented pearlescent substance is both sacred and fun to play with. Squish it, bounce it, stretch it -- just don't wipe it on the back of the couch."

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SOMEONE IS TAKING THE PIZZ

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"Shopping, gaming,chat rooms, cyber-dating - the internet is such an addictive and time-consuming force, who's got time to go? With the Internet Urinal, you'll never have to leave your computer again. Imagine the freedom - destroy your opponents on network Quake without taking a break; drink as many cans of Jolt as you want and still be able to make that last important trade before the market closes."

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More Nonsense From The Press

     Hear Ye  Just Say No: In September, police in Hertfordshire, England, stood fast under criticism for their program of placing posters around the area reading, "Don't Commit Crime." Said a police spokeswoman, "If stating the obvious helps to reduce crime or has any impact at all, we will do it." (The police also installed signs at gas stations: "All Fuel Must Be Paid For.") [Daily Mail (London)

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Heres a real surprise!!!!

Tommy Tester, 58, minister of Gospel Baptist Church in Bristol, Va., was arrested  after he allegedly urinated at a car wash, in front of children and police officers, while wearing a skirt. (Police said alcohol was involved.)  Red Wine 

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Catherine Delgado, 35, was arrested in Annapolis, Md.,  after she appeared, smudged with fudge, in a hotel lobby around midnight with "large slabs of fudge bulging out of her pockets" (according to a Washington Post story). A police officer later checked a nearby Fudge Kitchen store and found the door inexplicably open and a large display quantity missing from the front window. (Police said alcohol was involved,no, i dont know if she was drunk i would have said first  she had a severe case of the munchies or second of all she was most likely just a greedy *%)$^"! .)

 Candy Bar                               Candy Bar 3                                    Candy Bar 2                                               Chocolate                                          Pie 

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Boy do i wanna beat some kids after i read stuff like this...........

The adolescent offspring of some well-to-do parents are serious art collectors, according to a September Wall Street Journal report, and their interest appears not to be motivated solely by parents' strategies to shield income from the tax collector. Ms. Dakota King, 9, for example, owns 40 pieces and specializes in animals and "happy colors." Ms. Shammiel Fleischer-Amoros, 10, who admitted, "I'm really scared, but Daddy told me I have to negotiate," succeeded in getting $200 knocked off of a $3,200 sculpture she really wanted. An 11-year-old last year "waved a paddle" to win a $352,000 Jeff Koons sculpture.

 

The Ultimate Home Cinema This is What $6 million Gets you!!!!!

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If you want to see more pics and all the specs for this guy's system pop over HERE